The Night Before

Tonight I am saying goodbye to my chocolate, my sweet rolls, and my white bread. Why you ask? I am starting yet again another weight loss journey. Now I know your thinking oh my goodness Lyndsi is this ever going to actually happen? You've done this a thousand times before and you always fail or make an excuse to give up. Not this time! I have to answer to this blog. I hope that I can have followers that can make me answer for my actions. Now I am not going to post my weight or anything tonight I am blogging it all in tomorrow. I needed to just start this so I had to answer to you all tomorrow!

My Long term goal is to lose 100 Pounds by the year 2012.

Now I truely believe that long term goals are not possible without short term goals!
My long term goal being so big i need alot of really good short term goals to help make me feel as if I have accomplished things!

My goal this week is to lose 4 pounds.

My goal for tommorow (Saturday) is to log all my food "Diet is 80% of weigh loss"

I want to tell you all a little about my history in weight loss. I have been a heavy girl my entire life. I think the last time I wore a size 12 pant was in 7th grade. Every year I got new clothes for school not because it was a new school year, it was because I had gained so much weight. I never really understood why I couldn't eat the entire box of donuts, Or why i needed to go outside and be active, When every sport I tried I was the worst on the team and during games I would sit on the side. Then I found track thinking this was no envoronment where I would be compared to anyone. My coach was also a football coach. He made fun of me for sticking my tongue out at the end of a sprint.... I never went back.
My best friend Ashley helped me start to understand that I didn't have to be in a compititive environment to be active. She would wake me up every day in the summer early and we would run around the block and stop at her house and do pilates. I loved that I wasn't being compared to another person or team. I wasn't so great at running. I could barely make it up the street. I felt so dumb most days but Ashley made me feel like I could do anything.
Then school started 9th grade, new school. I was so excited to try sports now that i was more active. Still I was not picked for the team I was a Manager. I would go to every practice and eat my candy bar while I watched everyone ELSE. At the end of 9th grade my cousin from salem had lost 90 pounds. I concidered her and I to be one in the same. I was so excited for her. Her mom Tami had lost all her weight and had chosen a career in Personal Fitness training. She starting telling us to watch what we ate and how much we ate. So I wrote everything down. It felt so good. That summer I spent 2 weeks with my Aunt Tami and my Cousin Tiffani. I lost twenty pounds. It was like being on the biggest loser then had healthy meals for me and took me to the gym every morning and pushed me. I was feeling so good. I was going to start school eating right and staying active. We got me a gym pass to Stroops Fitness and a buddy pass so I could bring with me whoever I wanted.
High School then started and on the very first day your being rushed during lunch and I had my snacks for between meals. I got a salad at Mcdonalds for lunch. Mcdonalds was were my ride chose to go for lunch I sat down to eat and some senior boy said to me "Your going to eat a salad.. Good luck with that" he said with a chuckle. I was so embarrased I had no time to eat it. I had to throw half my salad away. I ate cheese burgers the rest of the year. I started a job at Tinseltown and got free popcorn and soda everytime I worked. I ate popcorn for dinner most nights and got addicted to DR. Pepper. Junior year went pretty much the same way. I stayed active and went to the gym and took a body building class which I loved. So i never really gained much after I gained all those twenty pounds I had worked so hard for.
My senior year was when it went further down the hill for me. I was happy and was fine with my body even though I could've lost twenty or thirty pounds I was still happy until I was date raped. I was so down I created a relationship with him and was verbally abused and manipulated and my only comfort was food. After gaining thirty more pounds I found a way out. I felt I deserved to be treated better after I met someone who showed me I was worth more.
I later met my husband ryan and was so happy, but wanted to be Mrs. Housewife and made lots of fatty homecooked meals and still couldn'tbring myself to the gym.
After having twin girls and getting to my all time high of 284 pounds I decided to start my weight loss journey yet again. I stopped drinking soda in August 2010 and have not had any since. I did really well and lost 20 pounds and here I am again ready to change my life and be healthy and happy for my wonderful husband Ryan and my two beautiful girls Taylor and Taytum!
Wish me luck!